Wasteman #7 – The Rude One

Everyone can be a little bit rude or have a bad day, but there are some guys who are beyond the point of cute banter and are just downright pricks.

The rude wasteman usually claims to be emotionally detached and warns you not to catch feelings, or if at any time you try to bring up the subject of liking each other/getting together or whatever, he will either ignore you or change the subject or pretend he doesn’t know what you’re talking about.

The genius of the Rude One is that they have mastered the art of the Wordsmith and cropped down to just one word that can make himself irrestible to almost any woman. Irrelevant.

Don’t be confused by the wording – the word irrelevant is so powerful it will leave you confused and wanting more of him. Let’s say you snap under the pressure of not getting much of a response out of him and you send him a long txt/ping/KIK/whatsapp of how you feel about him and what a prick he has been… Rather than replying in retaliation or just saying OK, the rude one will ask what the hell you are going on about and when or if you take the time to explain and simplify what you want, he’ll reply that everything you just said is Irrelevant.

Its more aggravating than if he were just to reply ‘OK’ or ‘k.’ But this one word has now managed to make you yourself feel ‘irrelevant’ and it also creates an air of mystery about him. No guy can receive a long paragraph message from a girl and not have an opinion about it. Its a power play. You are confused and probably more upset than before and now you want to try harder to get a reaction out of him.

The main problem with majority of the female species is that we are hell-bent on changing a guy we like but who doesn’t necessarily treat us like we want him to. You will never be able to change a guy. If his nature is rude, he is going to continue to be rude. Most likely the more you try to change him the ruder he may get. It’s in your best  to “kick his ass to the curb”. Seriously, you’ll just end up having an emotional break down & crying underneath a table *cough cough*…

How To Spot Him

All it takes is the magic word.. He may start out with cute banter, but as soon as he says the word Irrelevant (a few times, give him a chance), alarm bells should be ringing.

This type of guy is not for those sweet and innocent girls out there. Its not that a rude guy is incapable of loving, it may just be that he’s not really that into you. To be honest, if a guy really likes you, he should go out his way to make you feel special. There is no such thing as a person making you feel like shit by accident, multiple times. If you think you can handle a rude guy, don’t get too emotionally attached too soon. If you stick through it you don’t have to worry about other girls wanting him or him cheating. He may be testing you to see if you’ll stick around later.

Go to the 50 Shades of Wastemen page for more posts.

Wasteman #6 – The Hotel User

Ladies, whatever you do – whether you’ve just met a guy or you’ve known him for a few years… If he insists on going to a hotel, for whatever reason, don’t go. Unless he is your man and there is a special occasion, you have no reason to be going to a hotel with a guy unless you want the following to happen. Here’s how the night will pan out.

Even if you are down to do the only thing there is to do in a hotel room with a member of the opposite sex, the night wont go how you expect. You may be thinking you’re in for a night of love and passion. Multiple rounds and orgasms, falling asleep and waking up again to sleepy kisses and cuddles. No. First of all, you’re lucky if he pays. If he tells you to book and he will give you the money on the day – it’s very unlikely that he will. If you have a guy that likes to splash cash he might pay for 2 nights so you don’t have to check out my midday – the same thing is still going to happen. When you arrive, TV turns on, spooning ensues, and before you know it, you’re forking.

WARNING**** a guy that insists on going to a hotel rather than going to his house, regardless of whether he lives by himself, with flatmates or his ‘rents, there is a very high chance that he will be one or both of these things about to mention. 1. An abomination as a penis. 2. Doesn’t last very long.

He may try to will try to fork you without a jimmy (condom) and try to front like he didn’t expect the current situation to happen. “Let me check if I have some” if you dont have any, will probably the words to leave his mouth. Believe me he does. Unless he’s a bigger wasteman and claims he is allergic to latex.. Even if he is, there are alternatives available on the market. Once that is sorted out, unless you dont like condoms either, you’ll be lucky to get 2 rounds out of him, then his phone will conveniently ring and one of his boys will be in some sort of trouble. He will leave – and please believe me, he is not coming back. Make sure you have money for food or eat before hand, or better yet, got him to buy something. You’re lucky if you get hold of him on the phone, if he hasn’t blocked your number. He will promise he’ll be back in an hour – but you will wait, and he won’t come back. Chances are you wont have been fully satisfied -so now you’re in a hotel room, one your ones, horny, and most likely pissed off, confused or frustrated.

How To Spot Him

If you’ve just met him and he offers to pay for a hotel but on the day or asks you to pay for it and he will pay you back, theres a good chance he will be a hotel user. This also applies if you’ve known him for a long time.

Always make sure you’re safe and you know where the hotel is, and how to get home if you do decide to go. Make sure you know how you get home and have money for bus, taxi or train. Guys usually use this plan if they know they can’t really satisfy a woman – he will get his own and leave once you’ve clocked what happens. Just when you think its about to get good…

Go to the 50 Shades of Wastemen page for more posts.

Wasteman #5 – The ‘Realist’

‘I’m just being real’ has recently become one of my most loathed statements to be uttered by the human species. What does it mean? Some people claim it is being honest with yourself even in a situation that would be awkward but as of recently it seems that being ‘real’ is used almost as an excuse for people to NOT do what they are supposed to do.

So why is a realist a wasteman? Some people might not understand what I’m talking about right now so let me give a hypothetical example. Say you were related to someone famous or well established and you are interested in their field of work. Say your cousin was a well established psychologist and you had an opportunity to ask them to help you on a research paper or be part of one of their studies however you decide against this with the reasoning that you are being humble & ‘real’. You’re not being real with yourself, in fact you are being one of the greatest waste of space on the planet.

Being real doesn’t mean you have to stay broke. If anything by refusing to better yourself in life you are being unreal. Perhaps you are trying to stick to a particular stereotype that you feel has been put on your shoulders, or maybe you think that if you leave your area or financial situation that you share with a few of your peers they will pass judgement on you. If this is the case then that’s all the more reason to get up & do something.

Sometimes assuming that being real gets you hated is a false pretence. Its either that the people you were associating yourself with never really supported you & your philosophies or the things you do under the cover of being real are so amazingly stupid that you just people off.

How To Spot Him

if he refuses to step out of the box and do something useful with his life, you probably have a ‘realist’. In case you haven’t noticed I am using the term realist in a sarcastic manner. The qualities of a ‘realist’ are very similar to those of the Ambitionless.

Go to the 50 Shades of Wastemen page for more posts.